I Want My MTV

Remember when MTV was good? When it had some kind of relevance? No, we'll it has been some time.
MTV not as good as it once was, it's not exactly a revelation I know. But it really was a decent Chanel. Or maybe it has always been awful and I just remember because it in a time when almost all the music information I got was from MTV. That or music magazines.
The post school routine was to switch on MTV News at 4pm.
‘Let’s see what Billy Corgan is whining about and what airport Snoop Dogg is getting arrested at today. Ah no, its that twat Jamiroquai going on about his new Lamborghini. Oh look, I see Courtney Love is back on the smack.

Recently I saw a video on Youtube called why MTV Don't Play Videos Anymore. Watch it below. It sums it up better than me.
So I don’t like MTV as much as I used too. I’m not supposed to. After all its not aimed at people in their thirties. I couldn't even name one song by No Direction. And I'm happy to keep it that way.

The So Called Non Celebration

This season it seems like every week there's a so called 'non celebration'. It's become a football fashion, a kind of fad. Like The rocking baby celebration when a player recently becomes a father (Gareth Bale has done both of these celebrations over the last few weeks).

The thing that I don't like about the non celebration is that the player isn't so much as doing it out of respect for his former club and supporters but to make himself seem like such a decent kind of bloke in front of the cameras. It just comes across so false.

Okay so I don't expect a player to run the length of the pitch and slide on his knees right in front of the fans that used to sing his name, like how Emmanuel Adebayor did when he scored against arsenal a few seasons back.
But don't score a goal and give a look like someone just pissed in your cornflakes.
How about some middle ground. Like an understated raised hand and an acknowledgment to the team mate who assisted the goal.

The Dream Sequence

"So I was looking out the window and I saw a younger version of myself in the garden. Except the garden was overgrown with tall twisted vines. Then an elephant smashed through the fence and came charging at me so I began climbing up one of the vines. I kept climbing and climbing, I was almost at the top of the vine when it melted like ice cream in the sun. I was falling and just as I was about to hit the ground I woke up."

Its boring hearing over peoples dreams isn’t it.
Even more boring is long dream sequences in film or TV.
Earlier this year I revisited The Sopranos. From first episode to last. Of course its brilliant TV, though for me the weakest episode by far is the one in the fifth series called The Test Dream. The clue is in the name, and features a very long dream sequence.
Just when you think its stopped and we can get back on with the story it turns out that Tony waking up was part of the dream and it goes on for another ten minutes or so.

It’s the sort of episode that wins awards because it apparently shows so much imagination. Whatever, I’m not interested in these surreal moments in Tony’s dreams that may or may not represent some hidden meaning. I’m more interested in the plot and the characters. Not some David Lynch style over substance surrealism.
I've just never managed to make it all the way through a David Lynch film.
No I was never a student with a Blue Velvet poster on the wall.

The Perfect Take

Its impossible to say what my definite favourite song of all time is. Depends on the day, and only then I could only narrow it down to a rough top fifty
But if I had to choose then Waiting for the Man by The Velvet Underground would be a strong contender. I’ve recently downloaded an alternative take of the song. Its good but doesn’t have the same impact of the one that appears on the album.
I’ve also got some live versions of the song that are slower and nowhere near as intense.
David Bowie covered it and it there’s nothing great about it at all.
Infact no version comes close to the one from the album. Its menacing and sounds like it could fall apart at any minute.
A great moment captured on tape.

The Big Issues

There are many issues and conflicts in the world that after years and years are unresolved. Such as the Israel and Palestine conflict. But for me the issue that I’ve been trying to figure out over many years is whether I prefer tea or coffee.

But I’ve finally made a decision that I’ll never be able to choose. I’ve excepted that it depends where I am and what time of day it is.
Of instance, the first and last drink o the day has to be tea but mid to late afternoon coffee usually takes over.
When I’m out somewhere I would never grab a cup of tea because it will never taste as good as when I make one at home.

Because everyone thinks that they make the best cup of tea. Sure that the length of time they leave it to brew and at what point the milk goes in is the right way

Well not everyone. I was having this conversation at work when one of my colleagues. He said that one time he offered his father-in-law a cup of tea and asked him if he takes sugar he had to pause and think.
“Eerr… well I’m not sure. I’ve not made a cup o tea in over forty years. The wife always does it.”

That's taking old school to a new level.

Whatever way you wake your tea it doesn't matter. Whatever works for you.
But if you dunk biscuits into it then you are just plain wrong.

Sports Personality Of The Year

So well done to Andy Murray for being the first Britain to win a grand slam since other countries started getting good at tennis.

So after so much British sporting success this summer there’s now an overload of contenders for the BBC Sports Personality of the Year. Will it be Andy Murray, Bradley Wiggins, Jessica Ennis, Mo Farah, David Weir or maybe Rory Mcllroy? Or what about… to tell the truth I couldn‘t give a shit who wins. I’ve not watched the cringe-fest evening on the TV since I was a kid.

But whoever even makes it on the list would be a much more worthy winner than when Zara Phillips won it in 2006.
I’m sure you don’t need reminding that she won the individual gold in the three-day eventing competition at the World Equestrian Games in Aachen Germany.

Remember that? Course you do, the nation was gripped as we saw how Zara and her horse jumped over them fences in such style and did that sideways dancing thing to with such grace.

It was so special that the performance can’t be found on youtube. Because of course that would devalue it.

Christ almighty that must have been a very barren year for British sport.

Nirvana On Top Of The Pops

The early 90s, when American guitar bands discovered irony. And then post-irony, whatever that means. They mixed this with a self worth of authenticity and knowing cool.
The best and most obvious example of this is when Nirvana ‘performed’ their breakthrough hit Smells Like Teen Spirit on Top of the Pops.

Maybe the band were annoyed that they were only allowed to perform the vocal live so they thought they would properly take the piss. Jumping about with no relation to the music and Kurt Cobain’s comedy vocal. Its all done with a smugness of ‘this is so beneath us.’ and ‘we don’t even like this hit song anyway.’
Now I really like Nirvana but I can’t stand this performance. Not at the time and twenty two years on it looks even worse.
Its not like they had to go on the show. It wasn’t like someone was holding a shotgun to Kurt Cobain’s mouth. Oh bad choice of words.

London 0lympics 2012

So after seven years of build up the Olympics games came and went. And guess what, it was a success. Did people get to work or was everyone squashed onto the tubes from first train to last train? And
was there gridlock traffic throughout the city? No. I’m sure that people wanted it to be just so that they could say “See, told you so. Bloody Olympics.”
The whole city coming to a standstill was just a growling fever called Olympic Paranoia.
Sure the anti-Olympic lobby had some good points. One was the corporate feel to it. Yes fine but so does every major sporting event.
The brands might well be everywhere around the venues but you didn’t see them on the tv. Not like in other sports. Especially something like Formula 1 which is basically a walking advert.
Before it all began I heard a few people say its basically just a glorified sports day. Those people must never have seen Usain Bolt run.

Take your Shots

“Who wants a shot? You want one? Good. You? Everyone else having one? No, go on have one. Go on, just a little shot. Go on, stop being such a bore. Why not? Don’t be stupid, I’m getting you one anyway. Jagers all round. Go on have one, its on me. Don’t have a Jager then have something else. Have a Sambuca. I’m buying. Three Jager bombs and a Sambuca please. You don’t want it, I’ve already ordered. Come on just drink it. Go on. Ready? Everyone ready? Come on, take your shot. Ready, 1-2-3 gulp.”

These people piss me off. They are a pub nuisance. Go take it to that poncy bar up the road. Wankers.

Hyde Park Curfew

So at the end of the Bruce Springsteen concert in Hyde Park Sir Paul McCartney came onstage to have a bit of a sing song, only for the plug to b pulled halfway through the second song as they went over the curfew.
I Saw some mobile phone footage of it on the news. Everyone stops playing apart from Springsteen who carry’s on in his bombastic fist pumping manor. A bit embarrassing to say the least.

I have to applaud the authorities on this one. No I don’t care about the local residents. If you’re lucky enough (I mean rich enough) to live that central in London then expect noise. Especially in the summer months when there’s always a few concerts in Hyde Park.

What I applaud them for is not giving them time to do a rendition of Hey Jude. I’m sure they would’ve done it. And it would’ve gone on for ages.
“La la la la la la la… la la la la hey Jude, all the people at the back. La la la la la la la… la la la la hey Jude, all those in the front. La la la la la la la… la la la la hey Jude all together now.”
How much longer will McCartney continue joins other old rock stars on stage and bang out a couple of songs from the sixties?
Well there’s the Olympic closing ceremony. Then please, no more.

The Doors - The Changeling

The other day I was listening to an NPR podcast that had some bloke talking about a new book he’s wrote about The Doors. Do we really need another book, magazine article or film about Jim Morison and The Doors?
Of course not, but anyway, the guy was saying how their music was made in a time of (and therefore reflected) political uncertainty and fear. Such as Vietnam protests, assassinations, cult murders…
Yeah like there has never been any history or dramatic events before the late sixties or after.
Its easy to give bands and rock stars more gravitas than necessary. Like Dylan-olagists that believe the worlds answers are hidden in his lyrics.
Though the bloke on NPR was correct in saying that The Doors made some great songs and also some bad ones.
For me their strongest album is defiantly their last one L.A. Woman. So many great songs on it. The title track, Riders On The Storm. But none better than the first song.

Euro 2012 As It Happened

Szczęsny has a howler.
Pavlyuchenko (or as my dad always miss pronounces his name at his time at Spurs Paddy-o-chonko) scores Russia’s fourth and stakes their claim as contenders.
Van Persie plays like Emile Hesky.
Shay Given scores a diving header and gets chalk all over his face.
Spain use an experimental art project no strikers formation.
Shevckenko gets a brace. Mario Gomez gets a brace (wish he’d done that in the Champions League final).
Bendtner gets a brace and Ronaldo can’t hit a barn door.
Spain hammer Ireland and Roy Keane gets sick of ITV patronising them with 'but didn’t they have a good old sing song’.
Danny Welbeck back heal's a winner.
Ibrahimović puts his karate skills to use with a volleyed goal.
Ukraine v France match delayed because of a storm of biblical proportions.
Poland fuck it up and go out, as do Russia.
Greece put an end to the crap jokes about them crumbling like their economy. Christian Ronaldo finds his club form as he puts two past Holland.
Balotelli scores a great volley and then does one of his ever so annoying non celebrations.
John Terry clears a ball off the line that was actually over. 'Well it evens up Lampard’s non-goal from the World Cup' says the commentator. Not so sure that Ukraine feel that way.
Ronaldo’s bullet header.
Spain bore a half arsed France off the pitch.
Two bullet German volleys.
Joe Hart shouts and waves his arms about in the penalty shoot out until Pirlo shuts him up with a chip down the middle.
Ronaldo spends most of the second half against Spain doing that pre free-kick drama thing that he does. Only to blast all of them over the bar.
Balotelli's first half blows Germany away.
Spain run away with it in the final, putting to bed the Spain are boring theory.

The Best Stupid Song

In a previous blog post I mentioned how apart from a few exceptions I can’t stand songs that sing something like “na na na’s” or “la la la’s” in the chorus. Especially the use of it by British bands in the 90s to disguise their lack of song writing and musicianship. The Super Fury Animals song The International Language Of Screaming being an exception. Well the Wilson Picket’s Land Of A Thousand Dances takes the na na na’s to the extreme. Not only that but the verse’s are lyrically just as banal. Its basicaly listing types of dances. But as stupid as it is, with the bands driving rhythm and Picket’s voice I defy anyone to not like the song.

A Random Find On The Net - Anthony Pandofino

I randomly came across an album on a blog that I blindly downloaded. I've done that many a time, with varying results. Though its not that often that I download a real find that's a keeper like I did with an album called Gnosis by Anthony Pandolfino. Its down-tempo electronic, that has a dark drone undercurrent beneath the rhythm. And that's about all I know about him. The only other information I could find is that he’s based in Tampa, Florida. No pictures, no bio. Only great music. Get a free download on his bandcamp page here

Gus Gus

Somewhere in the 90s I started listening to the Icelandic electronic outfit Gus Gus. Back then I had almost nothing to do with electronica type stuff. I wanted guitars and an actual drummer, not a drum machine, that’s not real music!
Gus Gus were the exception, and the two albums Polydistortion and This Is Normal were played and played.
Listening back to Polydistortion apart from a few songs it doesn’t stand up as well as I remember it. But the electronic pop of This Is Normal certainly does.

The Limpest Of Combacks

I saw a clip of the reformed S Club formally known as S Club 7. That was when there were seven in the group. The comeback is a limp three members.
That’s embarrassing enough in itself, but add to the fact that they are in their thirties, carrying a few extra pounds and singing songs that were always aimed at the youngest end of the record buying public, well it takes cringe to a new level.
I didn’t make it all the way through the song (I defy anyone to) but skipped to the interview at the end. When asked why they’re a few members short the reply was that everyone’s busy, a couple of them are in the theatre and another member has just had a baby.
So they are getting on with their life’s. Instead of desperately clinging on to when they had some success in a pop group back in the nineties.
I almost feel sorry for them. But I don’t because I don’t understand why they can’t just get a job. They will make a lot more money working behind a till or a bar.
And there’s no embarrassment in that.

The Deep Dark Woods - The Place I Left Behind

Alt-country, americana, folk/country rock, call it what you like, but you know, that sort of thing used to be what I would mostly listen to. But over recent years any new stuff hasn’t grabbed my attention that much. Apart from the Canadian band The Deep Dark Woods. Their recently released fourth fourth album The Place I Left Behind is their best yet (just about edges it over the brilliant Hang Me, Oh Hang Me). The songs are mainly on the theme of the title track. That of leaving a place, looking for somewhere new, getting away, but not being able to escape what you left behind. A truly great album that should get the band some more recognition. Follow link to get the title track The Deep Dark Woods - The Place I Left Behind

Hamell On Trial - Choochtown

I understand that Ed Hamell aka Hamell On Trial is going to record a new album. The last album of new compositions Songs For Parents Who Enjoy Drugs came out in in 2006, so its been a while. That was released on Ani Difranco’s record label Righteous Babe and was produced by her. In the main produced badly. When Hamell plays live he's a sweaty one man band acoustic guitar machine gun attack. None of that was captured as it was on the 2008 live album on his one man show The Terrorism Of Everyday Life at the Edinburgh festival. Without a record label behind him the new album has a small budget. So I’m sure it'll be good as it was with the brilliant Choochtown released in 2000 that was recorded in his basement. When I first heard that album with the intertwining stories about low level criminals and fuck ups in the heart of the city I thought it may be an album that I will visit regularly in years to come. I was right. I heard it today for the first time in a while and it sounds as good as ever.

Anti-Social Eaters

I read today that food and drink in the London Olympic venues is going to be expensive. Really, you don’t say. Of course it will be. That’s a given.
But people will still be queuing up to get a seven quid burger to wash down with their five quid coke. Some people just love stuffing their faces with junk food at sporting events, the cinema and theme parks. Its like everything else going on is a backdrop to the main attraction of food.

But if they want to spend a fortune fine, it doesn’t bother me. What bothers me is the anti-social eaters. I’m talking about the people that think that its perfectly acceptable to eat their lunch on the tube.
A sandwich is bad enough but the people who bring on stinking junk food are a breed apart. I’ve been annoyed with people on the tube many a time. Who hasn’t. What with being squashed against someone with too much perfume or aftershave on. Or bad body odour. Or someone who keeps sniffing or coughs without putting their hand over their mouth.
But Never have I been more annoyed with the person who sat next to me with a Big Mac and fries.
Or the woman who sat down opposite me on a near empty carriage and chomped away on fish and chips. The stink of it.
These people must have no self awareness about what cunts they are.

Killflavour

I downloaded this song a couple of years ago from Last FM. There was no thought or reason why I chose to download a song from a band that I’ve never heard of but what’s the worst that can happen. I download it, don't like it and then delete it.
That’s happened many a time but the song The One, The Rat, The Snake from the Germany band Killflavour was a keeper. From Germany and yes it is Kraut Rock. Great Kraut rock that’s distorted, intense and motors along relentlessly.
On the back of it I downloaded some more stuff more them but wasn’t too impressed by it. Don’t matter though as there’s always this song don’t change this song.

Follow link to Download Killflavour - The One, The Rat, The Snake

Damon Albarn's Pretentions

Damon Albarn has a solo album out. Que broadsheet music writers swooning with descriptions like: prolific musical chameleon.
This time he’s taken his pretentiousness to a new level because the album is apparently “a strange pastoral folk album inspired by the life of 16th century mathematician, alchemist, and philosopher John Dee, who was a trusted advisor of Elizabeth I.”
So I guess he’s wearing his ‘I’m a serious thoughtful musician’ hat instead of his cheeky chap mockney one that he puts on in Blur mode.

Damon Albarn doesn’t play or sing a note on any of the music that I own. None of it has ever interested me. No, not even the album when he went to Mali, recorded a bunch of local musicians and played that toy like instrument that you blow into over the top of it.

The truth is that I’ve never given his music a chance. I just can’t get over my intense dislike of Blur. Their music and especially the floppy haired bass player that these days won’t stop banging on about his bloody cheese farm.
No doubt Damon’s album will sell a decent amount. Mostly to his devotees. Who will play it a couple of times, force themselves to like it, tell people it’s a masterpiece and never listen to it again.

Ride

Been on a bit of a 90s music vibe over the past week. Mainly of the British variety.
It has nothing to do with nostalgia. None of the “remember this song from back in the day, those were great times, I was so young.”
No, its just that The Stone Roses second album sounds just as good now as it did back then (I will keep banging the drum that it is a great album and not a let down).
One band that kind of passed me by at the time but I’ve since got into is band Ride. Quite how I missed them I don’t know. I can’t explain, I mean I didn’t own any music from Ride and yet I had that album from Alanis Morissette.

The Apptentice In Brick Lane

Every year I get drawn into watching The Apprentice. When the series starts I really can’t be bothered with it. Too many faces to learn and it will take about five episodes to realise who I want to punch in the face the most. But eventually it gets a grip on me. The episode that pulled me in this series was when the two teams set up a shops in Brick Lane with the intention of selling junk furniture (passed off as retro, vintage, or so called shabby chic) to the Shoreditch and Hoxton hipster gullible twats. To me this defined what The Apprentice is about, which is: Cunts selling shit to cunts to make money for a cunt.

Cover #14 Wooden Shjips - Vampire Blues

Yes another Neil Young cover. Its something about the mans songs that lend them so well to be interpreted by others. And Wooden Shjips interoperate the song Vampire Blues in the only way they know how. It is hardly recognisable from the Neil Young original that’s on the On The Beach album. Though that’s a good thing because in truth the original is not too good. A lazy plodding blues arrangement with Young singing “I’m a vampire baby, sucking blood from the earth” over and over. Wooden Shjips speed it up and add their usual scuzz distortion to it.



Follow link to download Wooden Shjips - Vampire Blues from Box.net

Roll The Dice - In Dust

An album that’s been on heavy rotation for the past month or so is In Dust by the Stockholm duo Roll The Dice.
I don’t have a favourite album of 2011 because I’ve not heard all the albums from the year that I want to. Such as the new Black Keys album which I will get I will get very soon. But if I was made to write a list of what I heard in 2011 then In Dust would be right up there as a top contender.
Its electronic with a warm analogue sound, and although it has driving hypnotic rhythms there isn’t a beat in sight. Instead they rely on the sturdy bass lines and piano. That and synths underpinning and thickening out the dark and moody sound.

Follow link to download Roll The Dice - See You Monday from Box.com

Titanic Failure

I saw the film Titanic at the cinema. The way it dragged on I thought the boat would never sink. Of course the film was very unrealistic, I mean as if the people who were reviving the ship would sit and listen to that old lady banging on about bolocks for three hours. “So you went to the front of the ship and held your arms out while he stood behind you. Well that’s all very nice but could you get on with it please.”

Now there is a 3D version of the film. I guess its come out now to coincide with the hundredth anniversary of when the Titanic sunk. Its all over the TV at the moment. There was even a documentary from the iceberg’s point of view.
Yes, yes I do know that about ninety percent of an iceberg is under water. File that under boring over told facts.

In Belfast where the ship was built there are tours on it. Its nothing to be proud of Belfast. The Titanic is revered and yet it’s a failure. A massive failure. Sunk on its maiden voyage. Like a boxer getting knocked out in one punch. A batsman getting bowled out with the first ball.
Guess that there isn’t many other tourist things to do in Belfast.

Elbow - Cast Of Thousands

The last Elbow album Build A Rocket Boys! didn’t make it onto any end of year lists that I came across. Sure there were many great albums released last year that never came anywhere near a list but after the success of The Seldom Seen Kid the follow up was an anticipated realise.
For me I was hoping that after finding success and acclaim they might go into the studio and make a real interesting record like Asleep In The Back or Cast of Thousands. But I had a feeling that they would walk down the middle of the road to keep the new fans happy with a couple of epic uplifting songs that will be played over sporting montages.
And that’s what they did but with the bland button on the mixing desk turned on full.
I watched their Glastonbury performance on the TV and it was painfully bland. Plus does Guy Garvey have to have a laugh and joke with the audience between every song? Get the fuck on with it!
I’m being hard on them because I know they’re capable of great work. And for me their best is their second album Cast of Thousands.

Smash The Ukulele

On catch up I just watched the Channel 4 ‘documentary’ When Keith Allen Meets Nick Griffin. I use the quotation marks because it was a documentary in the loosest terms. Keith Allen has been doing a few of these vanity project documentary’s lately. Louis Theroux he aint.
In the programmes introduction Allen explained how the meeting had been called off as Griffin called it off at the last minute. Allen persisted, and armed with a ukulele goes to Brussels and tries to speak to him anyway. Which he does.
The first brief interview went nowhere, Allen asking easy questions familiar questions to secure a proper second interview. The second interview was pointless and a third even more so. We know Griffin is a racist twat and this told the viewer nothing more.

My main grip with the programme was Keith Allen and his ukulele. Playing it on the Euro star, in the hotel lobby, in the European parliament, while he’s intervening Griffin in his office. If the thinking was that the ukulele is a jolly fun like instrument that’s the polar opposite to Griffin then it didn’t come over like that. It just appeared pointless and annoying.
Which is how I would describe the ukulele. Sales of the instrument have risen dramatically in the last few years. They have apparently become cool (though I would say more hipster ironic cool, which makes it not cool at all) and are popping up all over the place, like on that annoying match.com TV advert which makes me want to smash the ukulele over the blokes head every time I see it.
Enough, it sounds shit. Play a guitar instead.

ITV Coverage - Waiting For Roy Keane To Snap

I don’t intend to turn this into a football orientated blog, but this week my evenings have been dominated by some great games on the TV.
But there was one thing that(almost) ruined it for me and that was the Chelsea v Napoli match. Not the game itself but the dire coverage from ITV. Its standard to berate ITV’s football coverage, but not without reason.
Since Richard Keys and Andy Gray got booted out, Sky’s coverage has drastically improved. I couldn’t stand him as a player but Gary Neville has turned out to be a decent pundit. As has Graham Souness. The Europa league coverage on Chanel 5 has improved too. Their commentary is at least balanced, unlike the partisan ‘its us against the foreign team’ line that ITV take.
“But you got to cheer on the English team haven’t you?” No, anyone that says that doesn’t understand football rivalry.
Sure ITV want the English team to go through to the next round, that’s the bigger ratings winner after all, but don’t presume that everyone watching does. When Chelsea scored the eventual winner the co-commentator Andy Townsend celebrated with a “Yes, get in there.” Then near the end of the match when Didier Drogba was diving all over the place and feigning injury he described it as ‘clever'. If a Napoli player did that it would no doubt be ‘outrageous time wasting tactics'.
Then there’s the presenter Adrian Chiles who has somehow dumbed down ITV’s coverage even more with his inane meaningless comments such as “you would presume Chelsea to be the fitter team in extra time wouldn’t you?” Chiles gave no reason why and no one in the studio responded to him. Every time he makes a comment like this or some frivolous quip Roy Keane fixes a murderous stare on him. Or maybe that’s just how Keane always looks. I just hope that one day he snaps and throws Adrian Chiles though the commentary box window.
This weekend hopefully.

Marl Lanegan - Blues Funeral

I was thinking, when is Mark Lanegan going to stop pissing about being a voice for hire and get on with doing another solo record? Yes I like a lot of the work that he’s put his voice to. The three albums with Isobel Campbell were pretty good. The song Revival with the Soulsavers was truly great but the rest of the album wasn’t. The stuff with Greg Dulli had its moments. There’s other stuff that’s all fine too, but none of it is as good as the Mark Lanegan Band 2004 album Bubblegum.
Then I hear that a new album called Blues Funeral has just been released. So I ordered it straight away and its not let me down. There’s more of an electronic syth feel that’s a world away from his early solo albums like Whisky For The Holy Ghost. But don’t let that put you off. I’m still pretty fresh to it so I can’t say if I will be listening to it as much in years to come as I still am with Bubblegum. But it certainly has song songs that are as good as anything he’s put his name to.



Follow link to download The Mark Lanegan Band - The Gravedigger's Song from box.com

The Football Fans Fickle View

Fickle, it’s a word that I don’t like. The reason being is that for some reason I don’t like the way it sounds and the way it looks. There are a few words that I don’t like for these reasons and I usually avoid using them. Fickle is a word that is often used to describe football fans.
In football the highs and lows change in no time at all. Many times in a course of a season the media and fans can claim a team to be ‘in crisis’ only for the team to put a good run of results together and all is fine again.
Take the team that I support Tottenham. So far they are having a decent season. Third in the league and still in the FA Cup. Playing some great football along the way. But in the last two games they’ve been spanked by Arsenal and Manchester United. If they turn it around in the next couple of matches then it will be considered a blip but if the bad form continues then the knee jerkers in the media, fan forums and Twitter will be out in force. And in the space of a month the opinion on the players will have gone from great to useless. I myself sometimes get drawn into such knee jerk reactions.
When Manchester United scored their third goal on Sunday my thoughts towards the manager Harry Redknapp was “I hope he does take the England job. Maybe then we will get a manager that can get the team selection right.”
More scorn was aimed at the defence, especially Kyle Walker.
“He forgets that he’s a defender. Sure its great bombing down the wing but what’s the point when you switch off at defending set pieces all the time. Bring Vederan Corluka back.” was my reaction to his poor display.
A few games back I was saying that he has become one of he best right back’s in the league.
From great to shit in the space of a couple of games. If you are a Tottenham fan then you might recognise some of these thoughts on the players.

Brad Friedel
When team wins: What a shrewd singing he’s forty something years old and as good as ever. You can’t beat experience.
When the team loses: He’s too old to play at this level anymore.

Younes Kaboul
When team wins: He’s one of the most improved players in the Premiership this season. A rock at the back.
When team loses: As much as he’s improved he still makes errors and will never be a top class centre back.

Gareth Bale
When team wins: World class. Lets just hope we can hold on to him next season.
When team loses: Overrated. A so called world class player should be able to use both feet. We should cash in on him in the summer.

Ledley King
Legend, can’t even train during the week, turns up for the match and is pure class.
When team loses: A legend but the injury’s are catching up with him now. Its time to move on with a new captain.

Michael Dawson
When team wins: The defence is so more solid with Dawson in he ream. Always puts his body on the line for the team.
When team loses: He always puts his body on the line blocking shots because he is too slow getting to the ball in the first place.

William Gallas
When team wins: He may be past his best but he’s still got it.
When team loses: Why was he wearing red boots. Fucking gooner.

Benoit Assou-Ekotto
When team wins: A maverick, one of a kind. He plays like he couldn’t care less about the game. So cool under pressure.
When team loses: He played like he didn’t care. Sometimes when under pressure you just got to hoof the ball into the stand.

Danny Rose
When team wins: Will always be remembered for that goal against the scum but he’s really turning in some good performances now.
When team loses: Will always be remembered for that goal against the scum but he just isn’t good enough.

Niko Kranjcar
When team wins: Such a cultured footballer, he would walk into most other teams.
When team loses: How about putting a tackle in once in a while.

Jermain Defoe
When team wins: The best finisher in the team. A natural goal scorer.
When team loses: Stay onside. Stay on fucking side!

Luka Modric
Best midfielder in the country. Has the best outside right foot pass in football.
When the team loses: He would rather be playing for Chelsea anyway. He’s shooting is awful.

Scott Parker
When team wins: Five million what a snip. Should have bought him years ago.
When team loses: Stop running about like a headless chicken and giving away stupid free kicks.

Aaron Lennon
When team wins: When he’s on form he will skin any left back.
When team loses: Skins the left back then puts over a rubbish cross. What’s the point.

Louis Saha
When team wins: What a free singing he is. Could’ve been one of the top strikers in the world if he hadn’t pick up all them injuries.
When team loses: Past his best. Why wasn’t Defoe picked?

Rafael van der Vaart
When team wins: World class player, if he’s fit he has to play.
When team loses: Off the pace. Will he ever be totally fit? How about getting a corner past the first man for once.

Jake Livermore
When team wins: This season he’s come of age. Great to see a local lad in the team.
When team loses: Jack of all trades master of none. Will never become a regular first team player.

Sandro
When team wins: A beast of a player, though shall not past.
When team loses: Lets face it he’s had a couple of good games and a great game against AC Milan and that’s about it. How the hell does he get into the Brazil squad?

Tom Huddlestone
When team wins: What a passer of the ball, Hoddle -esc.
When team loses: Run fat boy run.

Emmanuel Adebayor
When team wins: A proper target man, has been the difference this season.
When team loses: Fucking gooner.

Football fans fickle. Never.

The Black Keys

If your looking for a up to date music news then this isn’t really the blog for you. You won’t find a sneak preview of the latest Vampire Weekend release here. I mean look, I’m posting a blog about The Black Keys album El Camino that came out at the back end of last year.
I only got around to listening to it a couple of weeks ago. I new it would be good, it was like I was saving the last piece of bacon on the plate.
Enough with the crap metaphors.
So if you haven’t heard it what’s it like? Fucking great. Is it better than Brothers? I think it may well be. Tell me more. No there’s no need to just get it.

Follow link to download The Black Keys - Dead And Gone from box.com

Catholic Priest House Visit

I caught some of the BBC documentary Catholics. It was the first in a series and it started with priests. Due to declining numbers there are only three places left in the UK where priests do their training.
Its hardly surprising, I mean who would want to become a priest? You’re not allowed to have sex and people think that you probably mess about with alter boys.

When I was a kid my mum would sometimes drag me along to church. God it was boring (shit pun, sorry). And I really didn’t care for the priest at all. Don’t worry he didn’t tell me to touch him in a special holy place or anything, but he was one of them old hard line humourless types that droned on and on in an Irish accent that people from Cork would have trouble understanding.

When I was about nine or ten he made an unexpected visit to our house and invited himself in. My mum was not best pleased as she was in the middle of cooking dinner. He didn’t care about that as he took a seat and dug my mum out about us not always turning up for church on Sunday's. She made her excuses, like how I play football on a Sunday Mornings.
“Church is more important,” he said sharply. “you won’t get into heaven by kicking a football around a field.”
“Well we will try to go this Sunday,” my mum said in a defensive manner.
As he left he said, “Going to church is like washing behind your ears, you don’t think about doing it you just do it.”
I remember thinking at the time: I’ve never washed behind my ears in my life.

My mum was so pissed off at his visit that I never got dragged along to church again, and she soon stopped going altogether.

Mountain Man

First things first, the Mountain Man are none of the sort. They are three girls. You might already know that as their debut album Made The Harbor came out in 2010, but I’ve only just become aware of them.
The album is short songs of stripped down folk with three part harmonies.
Now when I mean striped down I don’t mean like the first Bon Iver album where he recorded the base of the album in the woods then put overdubs on it (why bring Bon Iver into it? Well he’s riled me somewhat, liked the first album but his last effort was plain awful).
With just Vocals and acoustic guitar Made The Harbor is proper stripped down and has the sound production of a field recording that gives it a haunted feel. Quality stuff.



Follow link to download Mountain Man - Animal Tracks from Box.com

The Jawhawks - A Buyers Guide

The Jawhawks are touring Europe in march, its their first time over here in? I have no idea. But it’s a long time as Mark Olsen and Gary Louris only got the band back together the other year. But what a band. If you’re new to The Jayhawks but don’t know where to start then here is a quick buyers guide

All of their albums are good, with the exception of Smile which is the last album before the comeback. Don’t buy it, its rubbish. Nothing wrong with a band looking for a new direction but I don’t want an early nineties Manchester drumbeat and wah wah pedal funk to be anywhere near The Jayhawks.

Tomorrow the Green Grass is a great record and a must have. But Hollywood Town Hall is better than great. Country rock with harmonies catchy choruses and loads of melodic fuzz guitar solos. It’s a masterpiece.



Follow link to download The Jawhawks - Waiting For The Sun from box.com

Stop The Rap

Last Friday night I watched a bit of the programme Room 101. Never knew that frank skinner was presenting it now, that shows how long since I watched the programme. Anyway, Ross Noble was on it and wanted to lock folk dancing up in the room.
If I lived in a quaint English village then I would banish it to the room without any hesitation. But thankful I’ve only seen Morris dancers in action the one time. I was about seven and even at that young age it was apparent to me that they were a bunch of dicks.
Frank Skinner wouldn’t put them into the room and then said. “you might not like folk dancing but how about this:” and then out came some girls in tight tops and short skirts doing an Irish jig. Then another girl started beat boxing and at the end some bloke runs on and starts doing crap brake dancing.
Do I like it now Frank? No! Its so much worse. Haven’t we got over the let’s make something cool by doing a rap.
I heard a discussion on the radio a little while ago about education. A teacher called up to say that a good way to teach kids maths is by making it fun and cool for them. “I call myself MC Maths and I rap the times table to them.”
That blows away the cringe meter.
There’s an episode of the Simpson’s where Homer turn his hat back to front and does a rap. Bart and Lisa beg him to stop, when he does Lisa say to Homer “Promise me that you’ll never do that again.”

Cover #13 Saint Etienne - Only Love Can Break Your Heart

Only Love Can Break Your Heart is probably the most well known song from the dance indie pop band Saint Etienne. That might not be true but it is for me anyway. To tell the truth I don’t know any other song from them. I’m sure that I’ve heard some more of their stuff on a duke box in a pub or in an indie club back in the nineties or even on the radio. But if I recognised the song then I wouldn’t know that it was Saint Etienne.
So why am I posting a blog about them if I don’t know their music? Well because I do know the Neil Young song Only Love Can Break Your Heart and the great cover that Saint Etienne do of it. Musically radically different from the country/folk original but still keeping the same melody.
Maybe it is time I divulged into Saint Etienne’s back catalogued a bit.



Follow link to download: Saint Etienne - Only Love Can Break Your Heart

Rapture Riders

I’m not a big fan of mash ups. You know take one song and mix it with another song that has the same tempo and preferably the same key and create some kind of fusion. Sometimes when I hear one I might think that it was an interesting novelty but have no interest in listening to it again. But usually I’m left thinking ‘what was the point of that?’
There are a few exceptions and one is the mash-up done by Go Home Productions of The Doors song Riders on the Storm and Rapture by Blondie.
Works really well, even though it has that terrible Debora Harry rap that sounded dated a week after it came out.

The December Sound

I first become aware of The December Sound from a free sampler download compilation by Dead Bees Records. Though most of the songs were pretty good, their song Painkiller was the stand out track for me. On the strength of that I purchased one of their albums called The Silver Album which is a strong outing from start to finish. Its psychedelic shoegaze indie rock with a mechanical feel to it and is worth a listen, if that’s your kind of thing.

Follow this link to download The December Sound - Painkiller

Casino Sabbat

I’ve never been much of a gambler. When I say not much I mean I’ve put on a couple of bets and that’s it. Put money on a horse once and it didn’t finish. Put a fiver on Gabriel Batistuta to be the top scorer in the 1998 World Cup, he did well in getting five goals, but Davor Suker banged in six. I might have bought a lottery ticket once. When traveling around America I passed through Las Vegas for a couple of days and only wandered in a casino for a few minutes.
You get the picture, its not a vice that I partake in.
Though I did visit the new casino in Westfield’s shopping centre in Stratford the other Saturday. I think that by the end of the night I worked out how to play blackjack.

From the limited time that I’ve spent in casinos I’ve noticed that they’re the biggest cultural melting pot there is. No other place compares. Old, young, black, white, Asian, all together under the same roof desperately trying to claw back some money that the house has taken from them.
And it is the only place where a you’ll find a Hasidic Jew out and about on a Saturday night. Isn’t a Saturday the Shabbat? I didn’t think they were even allowed to turn on a light switch. God apparently goes mental when that happens.
After looking at what you’re not allowed to do on the Shabbat there is no mention of gambling. Though you can’t do things like plough, gather, plant, slaughter, bake, write and extinguish a fire. That’s right, you can’t put out a fire even if property is being damaged. Only if a life is at risk.
So I guess that in Israel even firemen get the Saturday off work.

The Rapture - Out of the Races and Onto The Tracks

I hardly ever listen to an album from The Rapture from start to finish. Some bands you only need a couple of songs from them and that’s it. Well The Rapture are one of these bands, I should give them more of a listen really but I have a feeling that they won’t sound any better that their song Out of the Races and Onto the Tracks.
There’s a line that’s repeated in this song that goes ‘Punishment in higher places’ I’ve just looked up the lyrics for this as I could never make out any of the words.
I used to think the words were something like ‘Paul loves shrimp in funny places.’



Follow link to download The Rapture - Out of the Races and Onto the Tracks from Box.net

Let's Say We Did - Follow Me Down

Following a handful of self released ep’s, the Stockholm based quintet Let’s Say We Did released their self titled debut album at the back end of last year.
On their ep’s the band were finding their feet somewhat but on the album it shows that the hours spent perfecting their melodic scuzzed up indie pop has paid off.
This album has the potential to be a word of mouth grower this year. And if not then I’m sure the next album will.



Follow link to Box.com to download Let’s Say We Did - Straight Back To You

The Replacements - Can't Hardly Wait

A mate of mine used to drive around in his van with a collection of three tapes that he used to play over and over. One was a collection of Minutemen and Firehose songs, one a collection of old country and bluegrass classics and the other a bootleg of a live Replacements show from the mid 80s that he said he was at (he’s a good few years older than me and used to live in Minneapolis). The Replacements had a reputation for their drunken ram shackled live shows, and the performance on the tape was no different. Though the sheer energy of the band still burst through the primitive speaker system.
That was my first introduction to The Replacements and it was enough for me to here some more from them. Glad I did.
Here’s the original more stripped back version of Can’t Hardly Wait that came out on the Tim reissue.

Follow link to download The Replacements - Can’t Hardly Wait (Tim version)

Cowboy Junkies - Sweet Jane Great Cover #12

The Cowboy Junkies have recorded many covers throughout their career, and they interoperate the songs as good as any band out there. Whether its a Neil Young, Bruce Springsteen ,Flying Burrito Brothers or an old blues or traditional song they always take it and mould it to their own laid back Americana sound with ease.
The first song that I heard from the Cowboy Junkies was a slowed down cover of The Velvet Underground’s Sweet Jane. Its from the album The Trinity Sessions but I heard it on some compilation of songs from films that Quinton Tarantino has been involved in (it appeared in Natural Born Killers, Tarantino wrote the screen play).
There’s also a great live version that I got from some other compilation that’s more up tempo and has a long intro with a piano solo and guitar feedback. I must try to find that CD the next time I go back to my folks, I thinks its in the garage somewhere.

When Music and Football Meet

When football and music come together its usually a very bad thing. Sometimes it can be good but that’s as rare as a Panda
I’m thinking Waddle and Hoddle singing their song Diamond Lights. Its now looked back as a funny and Chris and Glenn might have a laugh about it when its brought up in an interview on Soccer AM or Talksport but really, what the fuck was that all about?



What about Paul Gascoigne in his shell suit singing about the fog on the Tyne and sickly sausage rolls. Anyway sausage rolls are savory, not sickly at all.
Then there’s the Anfield Rap. Imagine the Liverpool team of today doing that. Would never happen. If they did then Luiz Suarez could use a racist term and claim it to be part of hip hop culture.
When it comes to football and music the mid 80s and early 90s has a lot to answer for.

As for good examples of music and football mixing there’s The Suntans of Ping’s song Give Him a Ball and a Yard of Grass. In fact for me it’s the undisputed song about football.
“Give him a ball & a yard of grass, he'll give you a move with perfect pass Give him a ball & a yard of space, he'll give you a move with godly grace.”



Then there’s film the film Zidane: A 21st Century Portrait which has a camera that just follows on Zinedine Zidane playing a game for Real Madrid and has the post-rock band Mogwai doing the films score. Though its not Zidane’s finest match and its not Mogwai’s best work, the combination works really well.
I watched it post pub. Now usually when I see a film late at night after a few beers my attention span is almost non existent. But For the whole film my eyes never left the screen.

Super Furry Animals - The International Language Of Screaming

There was a period in the nineties when bands from the United Kingdom would often sing “Na na na na” or “La la la la" instead of a verse with proper words. Maybe they couldn’t think of anything else to write. Maybe they intentional used it for that sing along poppy indie effect so it would help them get a slot on TFI Friday, get play listed on Radio 1, sell a few records and then blow all their money doing cocaine in Camden pubs.
I’m thinking of crap Brit-Pop bands like Shed Seven and The Bluetones, na na na na, fuck off.
The Welsh band Super Furry Animals are a band that sometimes did a few la la la’s, like on their song The International Language of Screaming. But they can get away with it because there's a lot more interesting stuff that’s going on in their music. And its one of the best song titles I know.

Braille Porn

Well now there’s a relatively new topic to rival that and its: “If you were on Dragons Den what would your idea be?”
I’ve been asked what my idea would be a coupe f times. On the first occasion I had nothing but on the second I came up with what I thought was a pretty good idea. Braille porn.
Porn is so easily available, boot up your computer, click, click, click and its all there. Soft, medium hardcore or just plain weird porn. The choice is yours.
But if you’re blind its just you and your imagination and that’s just way too much effort. -Even more so if you’ve been blind since birth. How would you know what sex even attracts you if you’ve never seen a man or woman? Maybe it’s the smell and touch? But if so then you can’t go around smelling and touching people when you reach puberty. Its instinct I guess, but still, it must be confusing. Especially if your not sure what sex you like.

But it turns out that someone has already come up with Braille porn. Never mind.

The Saints - (I'm) Stranded

Even though they formed and released an album before most of the other well known punk rock bands, Australia’s The Saints get overlooked as one of the genre’s formative bands. They are still going (albeit through many line up changes) but the only alum that I would recommend is the 1977 debut (I’m) Stranded which features the excellent song on the same name.
I made the mistake of buying a three CD box set of some of their later stuff which has a smoother mid tempo pop-rock sound. I’ve only heard it a couple of times.
What I want to listen to is the early up-tempo raw buzz saw guitar type stuff that’s like the Australian Ramones.



Follow link to download The Saints - (I’m) Stranded

Jim White - Christmas Day

“Amazing grace, how sweet the
smile upon the face I never thought I'd see you again...especially here in this Greyhound station...on Christmas Day...in 1998.”

Its that happy time off year, right? Yeah but what is the worst thing about Christmas? Well the shopping for presents is a bit of a headache. So are the Christmas songs. I don’t mean the Christmas carols I mean the same songs that get churned out every year. You know the ones. There’s no escape from them.
Shopping for presents in a crowded shopping centre that has the heating on fall blast and the same songs played over and over in every shop. That’s the worst part of Christmas.
But a seasonal song that I will be playing is the Jim White’s Christmas Day. Its not the most festive of songs festive songs and I certainly wouldn’t like to be stuck at a bus stop on Christmas day, but one of the great things about it is that there isn’t a sleigh bell to be heard anywhere.

Premier Passions

With Steve Bruce out of the Sunderland job it looks like we have seen the last of the old school generation of football managers that retired from playing in the early nineties, went into management and failed to move with the times.
For example Sunderland gave Bruce an iPad to do tactics and statistics on, but he claimed that he didn’t do much tactics. Also he said like a badge of honour that he has email but doesn’t know how to log on.
I can’t see Bruce getting another job at a Premier League club, no more than say Brian Robson, Terry Butcher or Peter Reid.

If you don’t know who Peter Reid is, well when Diego Maradona scored that great solo goal against England in the 1986 world cup, Reid is the first player who chases after him and finally gives up as Maradona reaches the penalty area.
He was actually a very decent player in his day but his stock as a manager has gone. I’m singling him out because I’ve just watched an episode of Premier Passions on Google video. It’s a five part documentary series that follows Sunderland in the 1996-1997 season when Peter Reid was the manager. With access to the dressing room you get to see pre match and half time team talks which basically consists of “Don’t fucking hesitate out there, get fucking right in their fucking faces and don’t fucking let them fucking settle. Lets fucking get them fucking tackles in.”

I’m not exaggerating at all when I say that even the manager of my school football team gave us a more insightful team talk. And a whole lot less unnecessary swearing.