I Want My MTV

Remember when MTV was good? When it had some kind of relevance? No, we'll it has been some time.
MTV not as good as it once was, it's not exactly a revelation I know. But it really was a decent Chanel. Or maybe it has always been awful and I just remember because it in a time when almost all the music information I got was from MTV. That or music magazines.
The post school routine was to switch on MTV News at 4pm.
‘Let’s see what Billy Corgan is whining about and what airport Snoop Dogg is getting arrested at today. Ah no, its that twat Jamiroquai going on about his new Lamborghini. Oh look, I see Courtney Love is back on the smack.

Recently I saw a video on Youtube called why MTV Don't Play Videos Anymore. Watch it below. It sums it up better than me.
So I don’t like MTV as much as I used too. I’m not supposed to. After all its not aimed at people in their thirties. I couldn't even name one song by No Direction. And I'm happy to keep it that way.

The So Called Non Celebration

This season it seems like every week there's a so called 'non celebration'. It's become a football fashion, a kind of fad. Like The rocking baby celebration when a player recently becomes a father (Gareth Bale has done both of these celebrations over the last few weeks).

The thing that I don't like about the non celebration is that the player isn't so much as doing it out of respect for his former club and supporters but to make himself seem like such a decent kind of bloke in front of the cameras. It just comes across so false.

Okay so I don't expect a player to run the length of the pitch and slide on his knees right in front of the fans that used to sing his name, like how Emmanuel Adebayor did when he scored against arsenal a few seasons back.
But don't score a goal and give a look like someone just pissed in your cornflakes.
How about some middle ground. Like an understated raised hand and an acknowledgment to the team mate who assisted the goal.

The Dream Sequence

"So I was looking out the window and I saw a younger version of myself in the garden. Except the garden was overgrown with tall twisted vines. Then an elephant smashed through the fence and came charging at me so I began climbing up one of the vines. I kept climbing and climbing, I was almost at the top of the vine when it melted like ice cream in the sun. I was falling and just as I was about to hit the ground I woke up."

Its boring hearing over peoples dreams isn’t it.
Even more boring is long dream sequences in film or TV.
Earlier this year I revisited The Sopranos. From first episode to last. Of course its brilliant TV, though for me the weakest episode by far is the one in the fifth series called The Test Dream. The clue is in the name, and features a very long dream sequence.
Just when you think its stopped and we can get back on with the story it turns out that Tony waking up was part of the dream and it goes on for another ten minutes or so.

It’s the sort of episode that wins awards because it apparently shows so much imagination. Whatever, I’m not interested in these surreal moments in Tony’s dreams that may or may not represent some hidden meaning. I’m more interested in the plot and the characters. Not some David Lynch style over substance surrealism.
I've just never managed to make it all the way through a David Lynch film.
No I was never a student with a Blue Velvet poster on the wall.

The Perfect Take

Its impossible to say what my definite favourite song of all time is. Depends on the day, and only then I could only narrow it down to a rough top fifty
But if I had to choose then Waiting for the Man by The Velvet Underground would be a strong contender. I’ve recently downloaded an alternative take of the song. Its good but doesn’t have the same impact of the one that appears on the album.
I’ve also got some live versions of the song that are slower and nowhere near as intense.
David Bowie covered it and it there’s nothing great about it at all.
Infact no version comes close to the one from the album. Its menacing and sounds like it could fall apart at any minute.
A great moment captured on tape.

The Big Issues

There are many issues and conflicts in the world that after years and years are unresolved. Such as the Israel and Palestine conflict. But for me the issue that I’ve been trying to figure out over many years is whether I prefer tea or coffee.

But I’ve finally made a decision that I’ll never be able to choose. I’ve excepted that it depends where I am and what time of day it is.
Of instance, the first and last drink o the day has to be tea but mid to late afternoon coffee usually takes over.
When I’m out somewhere I would never grab a cup of tea because it will never taste as good as when I make one at home.

Because everyone thinks that they make the best cup of tea. Sure that the length of time they leave it to brew and at what point the milk goes in is the right way

Well not everyone. I was having this conversation at work when one of my colleagues. He said that one time he offered his father-in-law a cup of tea and asked him if he takes sugar he had to pause and think.
“Eerr… well I’m not sure. I’ve not made a cup o tea in over forty years. The wife always does it.”

That's taking old school to a new level.

Whatever way you wake your tea it doesn't matter. Whatever works for you.
But if you dunk biscuits into it then you are just plain wrong.

Sports Personality Of The Year

So well done to Andy Murray for being the first Britain to win a grand slam since other countries started getting good at tennis.

So after so much British sporting success this summer there’s now an overload of contenders for the BBC Sports Personality of the Year. Will it be Andy Murray, Bradley Wiggins, Jessica Ennis, Mo Farah, David Weir or maybe Rory Mcllroy? Or what about… to tell the truth I couldn‘t give a shit who wins. I’ve not watched the cringe-fest evening on the TV since I was a kid.

But whoever even makes it on the list would be a much more worthy winner than when Zara Phillips won it in 2006.
I’m sure you don’t need reminding that she won the individual gold in the three-day eventing competition at the World Equestrian Games in Aachen Germany.

Remember that? Course you do, the nation was gripped as we saw how Zara and her horse jumped over them fences in such style and did that sideways dancing thing to with such grace.

It was so special that the performance can’t be found on youtube. Because of course that would devalue it.

Christ almighty that must have been a very barren year for British sport.

Nirvana On Top Of The Pops

The early 90s, when American guitar bands discovered irony. And then post-irony, whatever that means. They mixed this with a self worth of authenticity and knowing cool.
The best and most obvious example of this is when Nirvana ‘performed’ their breakthrough hit Smells Like Teen Spirit on Top of the Pops.

Maybe the band were annoyed that they were only allowed to perform the vocal live so they thought they would properly take the piss. Jumping about with no relation to the music and Kurt Cobain’s comedy vocal. Its all done with a smugness of ‘this is so beneath us.’ and ‘we don’t even like this hit song anyway.’
Now I really like Nirvana but I can’t stand this performance. Not at the time and twenty two years on it looks even worse.
Its not like they had to go on the show. It wasn’t like someone was holding a shotgun to Kurt Cobain’s mouth. Oh bad choice of words.

London 0lympics 2012

So after seven years of build up the Olympics games came and went. And guess what, it was a success. Did people get to work or was everyone squashed onto the tubes from first train to last train? And
was there gridlock traffic throughout the city? No. I’m sure that people wanted it to be just so that they could say “See, told you so. Bloody Olympics.”
The whole city coming to a standstill was just a growling fever called Olympic Paranoia.
Sure the anti-Olympic lobby had some good points. One was the corporate feel to it. Yes fine but so does every major sporting event.
The brands might well be everywhere around the venues but you didn’t see them on the tv. Not like in other sports. Especially something like Formula 1 which is basically a walking advert.
Before it all began I heard a few people say its basically just a glorified sports day. Those people must never have seen Usain Bolt run.

Take your Shots

“Who wants a shot? You want one? Good. You? Everyone else having one? No, go on have one. Go on, just a little shot. Go on, stop being such a bore. Why not? Don’t be stupid, I’m getting you one anyway. Jagers all round. Go on have one, its on me. Don’t have a Jager then have something else. Have a Sambuca. I’m buying. Three Jager bombs and a Sambuca please. You don’t want it, I’ve already ordered. Come on just drink it. Go on. Ready? Everyone ready? Come on, take your shot. Ready, 1-2-3 gulp.”

These people piss me off. They are a pub nuisance. Go take it to that poncy bar up the road. Wankers.

Hyde Park Curfew

So at the end of the Bruce Springsteen concert in Hyde Park Sir Paul McCartney came onstage to have a bit of a sing song, only for the plug to b pulled halfway through the second song as they went over the curfew.
I Saw some mobile phone footage of it on the news. Everyone stops playing apart from Springsteen who carry’s on in his bombastic fist pumping manor. A bit embarrassing to say the least.

I have to applaud the authorities on this one. No I don’t care about the local residents. If you’re lucky enough (I mean rich enough) to live that central in London then expect noise. Especially in the summer months when there’s always a few concerts in Hyde Park.

What I applaud them for is not giving them time to do a rendition of Hey Jude. I’m sure they would’ve done it. And it would’ve gone on for ages.
“La la la la la la la… la la la la hey Jude, all the people at the back. La la la la la la la… la la la la hey Jude, all those in the front. La la la la la la la… la la la la hey Jude all together now.”
How much longer will McCartney continue joins other old rock stars on stage and bang out a couple of songs from the sixties?
Well there’s the Olympic closing ceremony. Then please, no more.

The Doors - The Changeling

The other day I was listening to an NPR podcast that had some bloke talking about a new book he’s wrote about The Doors. Do we really need another book, magazine article or film about Jim Morison and The Doors?
Of course not, but anyway, the guy was saying how their music was made in a time of (and therefore reflected) political uncertainty and fear. Such as Vietnam protests, assassinations, cult murders…
Yeah like there has never been any history or dramatic events before the late sixties or after.
Its easy to give bands and rock stars more gravitas than necessary. Like Dylan-olagists that believe the worlds answers are hidden in his lyrics.
Though the bloke on NPR was correct in saying that The Doors made some great songs and also some bad ones.
For me their strongest album is defiantly their last one L.A. Woman. So many great songs on it. The title track, Riders On The Storm. But none better than the first song.

Euro 2012 As It Happened

Szczęsny has a howler.
Pavlyuchenko (or as my dad always miss pronounces his name at his time at Spurs Paddy-o-chonko) scores Russia’s fourth and stakes their claim as contenders.
Van Persie plays like Emile Hesky.
Shay Given scores a diving header and gets chalk all over his face.
Spain use an experimental art project no strikers formation.
Shevckenko gets a brace. Mario Gomez gets a brace (wish he’d done that in the Champions League final).
Bendtner gets a brace and Ronaldo can’t hit a barn door.
Spain hammer Ireland and Roy Keane gets sick of ITV patronising them with 'but didn’t they have a good old sing song’.
Danny Welbeck back heal's a winner.
Ibrahimović puts his karate skills to use with a volleyed goal.
Ukraine v France match delayed because of a storm of biblical proportions.
Poland fuck it up and go out, as do Russia.
Greece put an end to the crap jokes about them crumbling like their economy. Christian Ronaldo finds his club form as he puts two past Holland.
Balotelli scores a great volley and then does one of his ever so annoying non celebrations.
John Terry clears a ball off the line that was actually over. 'Well it evens up Lampard’s non-goal from the World Cup' says the commentator. Not so sure that Ukraine feel that way.
Ronaldo’s bullet header.
Spain bore a half arsed France off the pitch.
Two bullet German volleys.
Joe Hart shouts and waves his arms about in the penalty shoot out until Pirlo shuts him up with a chip down the middle.
Ronaldo spends most of the second half against Spain doing that pre free-kick drama thing that he does. Only to blast all of them over the bar.
Balotelli's first half blows Germany away.
Spain run away with it in the final, putting to bed the Spain are boring theory.

The Best Stupid Song

In a previous blog post I mentioned how apart from a few exceptions I can’t stand songs that sing something like “na na na’s” or “la la la’s” in the chorus. Especially the use of it by British bands in the 90s to disguise their lack of song writing and musicianship. The Super Fury Animals song The International Language Of Screaming being an exception. Well the Wilson Picket’s Land Of A Thousand Dances takes the na na na’s to the extreme. Not only that but the verse’s are lyrically just as banal. Its basicaly listing types of dances. But as stupid as it is, with the bands driving rhythm and Picket’s voice I defy anyone to not like the song.

A Random Find On The Net - Anthony Pandofino

I randomly came across an album on a blog that I blindly downloaded. I've done that many a time, with varying results. Though its not that often that I download a real find that's a keeper like I did with an album called Gnosis by Anthony Pandolfino. Its down-tempo electronic, that has a dark drone undercurrent beneath the rhythm. And that's about all I know about him. The only other information I could find is that he’s based in Tampa, Florida. No pictures, no bio. Only great music. Get a free download on his bandcamp page here

Gus Gus

Somewhere in the 90s I started listening to the Icelandic electronic outfit Gus Gus. Back then I had almost nothing to do with electronica type stuff. I wanted guitars and an actual drummer, not a drum machine, that’s not real music!
Gus Gus were the exception, and the two albums Polydistortion and This Is Normal were played and played.
Listening back to Polydistortion apart from a few songs it doesn’t stand up as well as I remember it. But the electronic pop of This Is Normal certainly does.

The Limpest Of Combacks

I saw a clip of the reformed S Club formally known as S Club 7. That was when there were seven in the group. The comeback is a limp three members.
That’s embarrassing enough in itself, but add to the fact that they are in their thirties, carrying a few extra pounds and singing songs that were always aimed at the youngest end of the record buying public, well it takes cringe to a new level.
I didn’t make it all the way through the song (I defy anyone to) but skipped to the interview at the end. When asked why they’re a few members short the reply was that everyone’s busy, a couple of them are in the theatre and another member has just had a baby.
So they are getting on with their life’s. Instead of desperately clinging on to when they had some success in a pop group back in the nineties.
I almost feel sorry for them. But I don’t because I don’t understand why they can’t just get a job. They will make a lot more money working behind a till or a bar.
And there’s no embarrassment in that.

The Deep Dark Woods - The Place I Left Behind

Alt-country, americana, folk/country rock, call it what you like, but you know, that sort of thing used to be what I would mostly listen to. But over recent years any new stuff hasn’t grabbed my attention that much. Apart from the Canadian band The Deep Dark Woods. Their recently released fourth fourth album The Place I Left Behind is their best yet (just about edges it over the brilliant Hang Me, Oh Hang Me). The songs are mainly on the theme of the title track. That of leaving a place, looking for somewhere new, getting away, but not being able to escape what you left behind. A truly great album that should get the band some more recognition. Follow link to get the title track The Deep Dark Woods - The Place I Left Behind

Hamell On Trial - Choochtown

I understand that Ed Hamell aka Hamell On Trial is going to record a new album. The last album of new compositions Songs For Parents Who Enjoy Drugs came out in in 2006, so its been a while. That was released on Ani Difranco’s record label Righteous Babe and was produced by her. In the main produced badly. When Hamell plays live he's a sweaty one man band acoustic guitar machine gun attack. None of that was captured as it was on the 2008 live album on his one man show The Terrorism Of Everyday Life at the Edinburgh festival. Without a record label behind him the new album has a small budget. So I’m sure it'll be good as it was with the brilliant Choochtown released in 2000 that was recorded in his basement. When I first heard that album with the intertwining stories about low level criminals and fuck ups in the heart of the city I thought it may be an album that I will visit regularly in years to come. I was right. I heard it today for the first time in a while and it sounds as good as ever.

Anti-Social Eaters

I read today that food and drink in the London Olympic venues is going to be expensive. Really, you don’t say. Of course it will be. That’s a given.
But people will still be queuing up to get a seven quid burger to wash down with their five quid coke. Some people just love stuffing their faces with junk food at sporting events, the cinema and theme parks. Its like everything else going on is a backdrop to the main attraction of food.

But if they want to spend a fortune fine, it doesn’t bother me. What bothers me is the anti-social eaters. I’m talking about the people that think that its perfectly acceptable to eat their lunch on the tube.
A sandwich is bad enough but the people who bring on stinking junk food are a breed apart. I’ve been annoyed with people on the tube many a time. Who hasn’t. What with being squashed against someone with too much perfume or aftershave on. Or bad body odour. Or someone who keeps sniffing or coughs without putting their hand over their mouth.
But Never have I been more annoyed with the person who sat next to me with a Big Mac and fries.
Or the woman who sat down opposite me on a near empty carriage and chomped away on fish and chips. The stink of it.
These people must have no self awareness about what cunts they are.

Killflavour

I downloaded this song a couple of years ago from Last FM. There was no thought or reason why I chose to download a song from a band that I’ve never heard of but what’s the worst that can happen. I download it, don't like it and then delete it.
That’s happened many a time but the song The One, The Rat, The Snake from the Germany band Killflavour was a keeper. From Germany and yes it is Kraut Rock. Great Kraut rock that’s distorted, intense and motors along relentlessly.
On the back of it I downloaded some more stuff more them but wasn’t too impressed by it. Don’t matter though as there’s always this song don’t change this song.

Follow link to Download Killflavour - The One, The Rat, The Snake